Grad school: To go, or not to go? That is the question!

Grad school has been the topic of discussion for most of this summer with my family. My Dad expects me to become a nurse practitioner. I usually act like that is what I want to do but honestly, I don't know if that's what I really want to do. I know I want to be a nurse I have not wavered from that decisions since I decided that was what I wanted to do my senior year of high school. I always had a pretty good idea that I wanted to do pediatrics but also liked the idea of doing labor and delivery. During my L&D rotation I figured out I only really liked the babies. My favorite clinical days involved the NICU and supporting parents going through rough times. My pediatric rotation was by far my favorite rotation. I remember my first day of clinicals, I was so excited I was like a kid in a candy store. I was assigned to the pediatric intensive care unit my first day. I was a little nervous at first, but as the day progressed I had a moment where I realized this was exactly what I was supposed to do. While I loved all of my pediatric rotations my day in ICU made me realize I have a need for adrenaline and giving parents emotional support. I love working with babies and Pediatric ICU you literally have kids of all ages. I have decided being a NICU nurse is my dream. I know there will be hard days but I also know there will be amazing days where I will know that it is exactly what I'm supposed to do.

But then there's this expectation of becoming a nurse practitioner, which is any where from 2.5 to 5 years of additional schooling. And my dad says it's always better to just get the degree and then I can go back to NICU nursing or work as a nurse practitioner or whatever I want, but really doing a minimum of 2.5 years of additional schooling for something I'm not passionate about doesn't seem worth it or to just work the job I was working prior to wasting 2.5 years to get the extra degree doesn't make sense either.

So let's say I go along with the charade of wanting to become a nurse practitioner. Both my dad and sister think they know admission requirements to become a neonatal nurse practitioner when neither one a) is a neonatal nurse practitioner, b) have looked at admission criteria, or c) have a masters or doctorate degree. For every neonatal nurse practitioner program, I have looked into requires 1 year of working in a NICU before you can apply. Which makes complete sense if you have an understanding of how working in nursing departments work. Most nursing student when they graduate will find jobs in one of two areas (regardless of their desired field of work): a new grad program where they are able to specialize with approximately 4 months of additional training, or they will end up in what nurses call a med/surg unit (general hospital floor). If you are able to get into a new grad program then you are streamlined to your desired area of work. If you choose or have to take the med/surg approach, it takes around two years to be able to move up into a more acute setting, and if you want to go into an even more specialized area it can take even two more years after that to qualify for those areas.

So imagine you are a new grad, fresh out of college never worked a job as an RN in your life. You might not have even had one day in NICU in your clinical hours. You want to be a neonatal nurse practitioner but you don't even have a clue as to how a NICU works or if you can emotionally handle that job. No program is going to take a risk on someone who might not even fully have their heart devoted to NICU. It would be a waste of their time and resources.

I get it. You probably understand it now too. But for some reason my family cannot understand the fact that you simply have to have one year of experience in a field before you can get a degree in it.

I get that my dad is just pushing me to continue my education as far as I can take it. That or he secretly wishes I was a doctor, like everyone else seems to want to push me toward. I just don't see my heart in being a doctor or doing an additional 3 years of schooling. I don't know if I want the pressure to be a nurse practitioner to be gone or for the pressure to apply for the fall after graduation to be gone. Either way I just need some space to figure it out and for my family to consider what I want to do rather than what they think is best for me.

Done making promises

Clearly I fail at this whole blogging thing, but I only have two followers so I guess I'm not really letting a huge crowd down. I'm done making promises. I do not promise to write weekly, monthly or even one more post for the end of the year. I'm tired of breaking promises, so if I remember I have a blog then I'll write. If I don't remember or can't thinking of something to write about then I won't write. It's really that simple. I am ready to try and remember to write again, but again no promises.

Finally actual pictures.

So in the whole time i've had this blog i've never actually posted any pictures that i've taken from my actual camera, which is ironic because its called From Cameras to Care Plans. So without further anticipation, Here is some pictures I took today.  

This is Lisa, she's my person. If your familiar with Grey's Anatomy you should be familiar with  this term but for those of you who aren't: "person" can be related to best friend with a bit of a different connotation and the fact i have an aversion to the terminology best friend. Person is the perfect substitute. She graciously volunteered to let me take pictures of her. 

 If you are interested in having pictures taken, let me know. Right now I'm trying to build a bit of a portfolio, so there would be no charge. 

I have no idea what to write about

So this week was really crappy for resolutions. It also was my busiest and most emotional week, but those are still excuses.

January is pretty much over and this is the point where most people stop having fuel to do their resolutions. While my week was extremely terrible and i think i forgot to post in my blog last week (im not sure my weeks are a bit of a blurr) I did realize one thing: We're all going to mess up sometimes, the key is to not give up when you mess up. The key is to regather everything, get back up, and start going again.

I was going to give a count by count how my progress on resolutions went but that would be a long and boring post.

I have a really hard time coming up with topics to talk about so if you have ideas or want my thoughts on something please comment or message me.

I'll try to come up with a topic and post more about it later.

Stuck in a plateau.

I was going to justify why i didn't post exactly during "the week" but it doesn't really matter. I did try once tho but i felt like my life was to boring to post about and that it would be boring to write about. I could also make the excuse of how i've been working on other resolutions but really excuses are just excuses. they don't make progress they hold you back from things.

This past week I managed to workout 8 times plus additional "sports" time. I though i ate reasonably healthy. But when it all came down to it I gained a pound. I know weight is just a number and that it really shouldn't affect how i feel but it does. I'm not bothered by the number. I'm bothered by the fact i've put in so much effort and didn't see results on the scale. I know if it were to actually do measurements I'm sure i probably lost inches and i know my Biceps grew a noticeable amount this week. Quite a few people told me they've been proud of my dedication. Seriously it's awesome people are proud of me, but what if I'm not proud of myself? I've been in the same 10 pound fluctuation since i came to school in september. This is probably just a plateau but when you loose 50+ pounds in 3 months then stay at the same weight for 3 you just get tired of being there and want to go back to losing the weight.

I guess that's all i have for now guys. Until next time i guess i'll just keep eating healthy and working out and hoping it works out better next week.

New Year, New Promises

Okay, So i completely failed to continue my blog once I got to school. Somehow i think we all saw that coming. But this is a new year and with the new year comes resolutions. I'm pretty sure the only resolution i made last year was to loose 25 pounds. I'm happy to say I almost tripled that number by loosing 70 pounds in 2011. Those are 70 lbs I will never see again.
I believe there's some form of accountability in writing things out and putting it on the internet. Like once you put it out there people see it and ask you about it and so you have to keep yourself accountable to do it because people might ask you how it is going and you don't want to say well actually i haven't been keeping up with my new year resolution.

So here is my list of New Year's Resolution to complete in 2012:
1. Loose another 50 pounds.
2. Work out three times a week and eat healthy (no matter what).
3. Write a blog post once a week.
4. Learn how to play 6 new songs on guitar.
5. Take a Risk (do something i normally wouldn't do)
6. Tell people more when I love and appreciate them
7. Say Yes more than I say No
8. Procrastinate less
9. Get 8 hours of sleep at least 4 nights a week.
10. Clean my room and do laundry once a week
11. Run a 5k (even if it's on the treadmill and not an actual race)
12. Travel somewhere i've never been before.

I figured 12 was a good number. there's 12 months in a year. it's the year 2012 (twenty-twelve).  So i plan on keeping you updated and hope if you read this you will keep me accountable. So don't be afraid to ask me about my New Year resolutions when you see me and don't be afraid to call me out when i don't follow them. Wishing everyone a healthy and prosperous New Year.